Mountaintop

Inspirational song: The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down (The Band)

One year and eleven months ago, possibly to the day (we're not sure), we came to Colorado to close on Mr X's mining claim in the mountains. The next day, we drove up to try to climb up to the land that is inaccessible by car or truck. We parked on the Forest Service road that goes through the neighboring property, and started a long climb up a mountain. From my perspective, it was straight up, like we were going up a ladder. There was some residual snow that day, but for the most part it was clear. It was fortunate that on that short late autumn day there was a full moon. Neither of us thought to bring a flashlight, and our phone batteries did not last long that evening. Our hike lasted much longer than the sunlight did. Most of that was my fault. I never made it all the way to the claim that day. Turns out that was not the most efficient route, and just past where I gave up was a serious rock field that I wouldn't have successfully traversed anyway. It took me for-freaking-ever to get back down the hill. I ended up scooting most of the way on my rear end, because I couldn't see the ground to plot my steps down the sheer drop.

I hadn't made another attempt to visit the claim since then. It took me a full year to expand my sea-level lungs, and the lupus and depression didn't help my motivation to climb mountains. Over the last few months, I've been working hard on my health and well-being. This week, while Mr X is here to help with projects, he announced that he needed to go up and see how his claim (and the stuff he left up there) fared while he was gone all summer. I asked him whether he'd be okay taking me with him. After almost two years, it has become a personal quest to make it all the way up to the top. I was finally ready to make my second attempt to summit that mountain. I stopped by Target to pick up a bright orange Broncos hoodie, to be seen as human just in case someone with a gun failed to recognize that there's an off week during hunting season. And then we were off.

The roads up there are mostly recognizable as roads for most of the drive, and then they become sporty four-wheel-drive paths, and then they become what I sarcastically call "roads," using air quotes when I speak. We weren't able to drive all the way up to where Mr X usually parks, because of a downed tree, but it only added about a quarter mile and unknown elevation gain to the walk. I was excited when I started, and I took selfies while I was still fresh, thinking that by the end I'd be in tears and looking like I'd just survived a war. The man put on a big backpack, and we started walking. It took me a while to really get warmed up. I panted a lot, but I kept going as much as I could, only stopping when I had to let my heart rate slow down. I was given choices whether to take routes with good views or longer but flatter walks, and I chose views with climbs. It wasn't easy, but it wasn't as hard as I feared. I was happy with the choices I made. The views really were spectacular.

I was more than three quarters of the way there before I had to make my first sit-down rest. And then before I knew it, we were there. I got to see his meadow, and it was beautiful, even with all the leaves off of the aspens. I saw the spring and the ponds he built and told me about (where he stored his beer, which he offered to share before he remembered that I couldn't drink them). I was impressed with all the fences he built to keep the dogs corralled. We found that the tepee had a little damage on one side, and some critters had been inside to eat everything that was made of leather, including the man's steel toed boots he needs when operating a chain saw. He showed me where he wants to build the 10x12 foot "shed" that he's allowed to create without applying for a well permit and digging a septic system (anything big enough to live in requires those things). Getting lumber and plywood up to this site, even with an ATV would be beyond difficult. I'm trying to persuade him that an actual log cabin construction for the shed would be the best solution. We shall see.

I swore that I was going to spend the rest of the day crowing about how proud I was to get up there, and I have done little else since. Listen to me: I completed a personal quest I thought I'd never master! I am so freaking proud of myself I don't know how to process it all. Even better, the walk down was not only easy and fast, but I helped him carry down the heavy chain saw for almost a third of the walk, way more than I expected to be able to do. My attitude remained positive the entire day. I didn't have to beg to stop, and when I needed short rests, he was totally fine with holding back until I caught my breath. By the time we drove back, I was noticeably hungry but not hangry (we hadn't eaten a single thing until late afternoon). We stopped at a restaurant in tiny Rollinsville, and got a surprisingly elegant meal in a cool atmosphere. Now I'm watching my Buffs struggle (what a horrible first half), and while tired, I'm not so sore or wiped out that I can't function.

Everyone who has played D&D knew those guys who liked to design their characters as rangers, because it fit their personalities best. In high school, I dated that guy for a year and a half. In college, not only did I date that sort of guy, I started a family with him. On a day like today, having him guide me through the mountains, and watching him point out "roads," bear scratch marks, big cat poops, and changes he wishes he could make all over the hill, it reminded me of why that ranger guy was always the one I spent time with in real life. It's handy having an eagle scout as your guide in the wilderness. I felt safe the whole time and I learned a ton about the wilderness and about myself. The day went so well, I hope he lets me go up there again sometime.