End of an Era

Inspirational song: I'm Free (The Who)

When I was 16, and I finally got my braces off, I remember looking in the mirror, singing along with Def Leppard on the radio, stuttering an F sound, while I stared at my shiny, straight teeth. They looked and felt so huge and smooth without the sharp, pokey brackets and wires that pinched. I was so pleased to be free of the mass of metal in my mouth. I'd had them about two and a half years, I think, and back then, that was such a long time to wait. It was one of those moments that crystallizes in your memory, that you refer back to often. So today, I started my car after the very last time I led a board meeting, and was happy to find Def Leppard there waiting on my radio. F-f-f-Foolin'...

It should be obvious by now that I am one of those people who strongly ties music to events. It was an automatic move, the day I started the blog, to open with an inspirational song. It felt right, and it seemed correct to continue it every day. Sometimes the song drives the content; sometimes it goes the other way. I planned for a few days to use today's song, for another reference to my teenaged self. When I graduated from high school, and my classmates asked me to sign their yearbooks, they had to wait while I wrote out the entire lyrics to "I'm Free," in every single book. I was so ready to close that chapter of my life, and run off to Colorado for college and new experiences. I feel that same exhilaration now. The board year has concluded. I offered a little advice (just a little), I thanked my outgoing board, and then I split. I'm still going to take their calls if they have questions, but as far as I am concerned, that book is closed. I'm free.

There was a stretch in there where I felt like a hostage. All the fun had been wrung out of being in the group, but I had an obligation to the position, and a promise to myself to see it to the end. I had to be prodded to do business at times, especially once the elections were concluded and I was officially a lame duck. I still want to be part of this organization, and I may even serve it in an official capacity as a service chair someday if they need and want me to, but I would have to wait until that doesn't reek of Stockholm syndrome. A summer off should give me a fresh perspective. I have made references to the breakdown of my relationship with several of the board members, and spoken hopefully of the recent improvement in those connections. Today was the strongest sign that the worst is behind me and the future has promise. Oddly enough, the moment that encouraged me most was a reference to the movie last year about the Iran hostage crisis. The woman I was closest to before the breakdown raised her coffee cup and teasingly offered "the Argo toast." I understood exactly the spirit in which it was intended, and I loved her for it.

I don't know what kind of picture to put for today. I thought about something like the sun breaking through the clouds, but I don't have one of those in stored photos, and it has been rainy for hours. I noticed yesterday that my hydrangeas are in full bloom, so maybe some nice blue pom-poms would work as a celebratory image.