Inspirational song: Somebody's Watching Me (Rockwell)
Somewhere in the last two weeks, my big trees on the back side of the Park, and giant crepe myrtles on the front fully leafed out. I have a bit more privacy upstairs, thanks to the largest crepe myrtle I have ever seen. It helps, because I have always had this thing about windows, especially at night. I am a grown woman, and yet I still feel like a six year old around them, waiting for the bogey man from the Legend of Boggy Creek to come flying through. It isn't better in daylight, when salesmen, missionaries, or con men wander my neighborhood, ignoring the No Soliciting sign on the door. I feel like they see me, hiding from answering the door, and it makes my stomach churn.
Tonight I do not get to be anonymous. Tonight I have to lead what promises to be a contentious meeting of the general membership, giving year-end reports and voting on next year's officers. I caught wind of "questions to be asked before the vote," which gives me a sinking feeling. I hate that there has been a total breakdown of trust between me and the crew taking over. I would ask what they are planning if I thought I would get a real answer. I need to spend the entire day, leading up to the meeting, making sure I am up on my bylaws and operating policies. I fear my knowledge will be tested.
Yesterday the man got word of when he is leaving. Those with the power dragged their feet as long as possible (lulling me to live in a fantasy world where he was delayed indefinitely and not really going), and now suddenly everything is rushed and he has to be out of here very soon. I don't want to be bothered with petty, mean-girl politics. I want to spend these last few days with the man, while I can.
I don't even feel like posting a photo today. Maybe tomorrow.
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