It looks like I can finally see the end of my holding pattern. I'm still circling, and will be for a while, but for the first time in a long time, it sounds like the air traffic controllers remember that I'm up here, in limbo. It's not time to panic clean the house or restock the pantry yet. I did, however, make concrete plans for "after" for the first time in over a year. I got an email for a ticket presale for a Mannheim Steamroller Christmas concert yesterday. Personally, I've never been a big fan. The man, on the other hand, has liked them since before we ever met. In a gesture of compromise, and an investment of a healthy dose of faith that he will be home by the time the show comes around, I bought tickets last night. Good ones, even, sixteen rows back, in the orchestra section. This is the first time I've been willing to commit to anything on a timetable that involves my man in a very long time. One way or another, I will be going to see this show, and I am placing a large bet that I will have my favorite date accompanying me.
Two more boxes of rugs arrived today. They are the first of a large wave of boxes headed my way. I think the fantasy of running a rug selling business is getting ridiculously closer to a reality. I still don't know where we would set up shop, or even whether it would be a brick and mortar shop or a less tangible setup. You will not find me in a crappy parking lot on the side of the road, with rugs on flimsy racks, selling out of a van. No blankets with eagles or Hello Kitty on them either. These beauties are the real deal, handmade and totally unique. The ones that arrived today were undyed wool, knotted in intricate geometrics, using just the natural variations in the colors of the wool, and a gorgeous green silk. The man is getting smart, too. He sent the silk one home in a nylon bag, so the cats don't get to investigate it like they did (and are continuing to do to) the wool one. Looks like tomorrow morning will involve a quick trip to Target for more plastic tubs to keep curious noses and loving little claws away from them.
Most places I've lived, July is the hottest month. We are nearly through it, and then there are just a few weeks of August where the heat is still at peak. My mind isn't here, in this hottest part of summer. My head is already looking at the cooler weather of autumn, when the spiders retreat, the grass grows less quickly, and my empty nest will be filled again. I can see the end, finally, and for once it doesn't seem very far away.
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