If ever there was a good day to hide inside while a storm raged outside, today was it. I'm feeling small and defeated, and I wanted to run from my obligations. I kept pushing myself, from the moment I forced myself out of bed, all the way up to work, to make the calls the boss demanded, to paint the downstairs room when the man rearranged furniture so I could take the next section, to write tonight when I'm wrung out like a limp dishrag. It was very difficult to adult today. I suppose I should be proud of myself for continuing to try, when I spent all day listening to my inner child whine "I don't want to" over and over. I'm not. I'm still the whiny kid. I'm ready to go to bed and pretend today didn't happen at all.
I was all excited about the basketball tournament this morning. I was excited until about one this afternoon, when I couldn't keep watching the last minute of the Buffs game. I filled out three brackets online, and in all three of them I picked CU to go on. I even got optimistic once and pretended we'd beat Kansas in the second round. Not so much. My brackets are thoroughly broken (Yale? Really?), and for my team the Dance is over. Ah, well. I'm still proud of them for making it this far in the process. Tomorrow I'll decide whether to keep watching the tourney on television. I'm not going to mope much, but I'm not going to be brash or strut around either.
It was lovely having a preview of spring, but it was time to take a few steps backwards into winter for a moment. A dry February led all of us to worry about the depth of our snowpack, wondering whether we were going to see a return to drought. My daughter wasn't thrilled to have a snowstorm today, but I'm totally cool with seeing the white stuff. The sky spit snow all day, and it tried to stick a little bit this morning. It was too warm to accumulate most of the day, but eventually the grass and cars started to freeze and it piled up in those places. The roads were still just wet the last time I looked outside, so hopefully that means my Friday appointments will still be on.
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