It’s really a shame. Of all the things to have left at home this morning, that I needed to have with me at a real estate annual updates class, I wish I hadn’t failed to bring my brain. It was worse because the class was taught by the owner of my brokerage, and I sat directly in front of him. I tried so hard to pay attention. I failed. There were something like 150 slides in the PowerPoint presentation (and we got them in an email, so I had an excuse to tell myself I can refer back later). I zoned out several times. I tried to take notes. We were told that our quiz at the end would be open notes, just not open neighbor. It wasn’t good enough. I missed one too many questions and had to stay late and admit to the boss that I just wasn’t all there. I was able to go over my mistakes and redeem myself on the quiz, but only barely. Even with a second chance, the brain was still at home, probably kicked underneath the bed, with the dust bunnies.
They say that more Americans call in sick today, the day after SuperBowl Sunday, than any other day. I wish I could have done the same. I slept so very little last night, between the massive stomachache of accidental gluten ingestion, and trying to sleep in the middle of Athena and Rabbit circling each other on top of me. Every single time I turned on my side, back and forth, one of the two of them crawled on my pillow to sit with their fur tickling my nose. The other would wedge up behind me, so I couldn’t escape. At least five times, they faced off against each other, while I wondered what my chances were of surviving the encounter without blood suddenly appearing. They calmed down around six, and my alarms started going off 30 minutes later. I still feel drained now, even after an involuntary nap this afternoon.
I’m trying to find ways to lessen my stress load, so that days like today are less draining. I desperately want to give away one of my volunteer jobs. It has become such a distraction that I am not functioning on an adult level. It’s interfering with my work, beyond the training classes I’m failing to stay awake through. I can’t focus. I can’t prioritize my to-do list. Nothing is getting accomplished. I hope I can find someone who wants this job. Surely there is someone out there who has a better tolerance for stress than me. (That covers almost everyone, right?)
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