It's a Beautiful World

Inspirational song: Because (the Beatles)

I am allowing myself to wander deeper into the shadowed woods of my imagination today. The smallest things are causing me to wax philosophical, to feel like everything is propelling me to a sense of rightness this morning. I just spent five minutes interacting with an insect that I had originally moved off my arm, but I let him crawl back up on my hand and walk around, just because he looked cool. I suspect he was a leaf cutter, and I actually thought about what plant in the Park I could sacrifice to him because he should be allowed to exist as much as I. I was invited to the beach today, but I declined, on the grounds I didn't feel up to making the drive down there (which was true), but also because I want to continue unraveling this chain of thought, all the way to its conclusion. It may take all day, and I didn't want to be interrupted.

A friend in the Midwest shared an essay about what Americans should know about how we are viewed by the rest of the world, and while I thought all of it was spot-on, what the author said about our emotional health was what set me off on this course this morning. He was correct, we are generally too focused on acquiring things, for the status, and for the illusion of comfort. But the pursuit itself is interfering with the result. We aren't able to stop the hunt to appreciate what we really have. I am once again struck at how lucky it was that I couldn't find work when we first moved here. It left me available to spend a year volunteering (which was an equal balance of stress and very satisfying successes overall), and as my duties wind down, I am allowed to take time to explore art, in all of her varied guises. I have wanted to do this as long as I can remember, but between finances, family commitments, and lack of focus, it never happened. Never imagine that I don't appreciate what a gift this time is for me. I am grateful every day.

My daughter mentioned recently that her iPod keeps shuffling to Beautiful World, almost every time she starts it lately. It's my favorite Devo song, and has been since I was a teenager. There are so many times I have wanted to use it as my inspirational song, but I stop myself for the same reason every time. The chorus ends, "it's a beautiful world for you. It's not for me." That's not the message I want to send. The world IS beautiful, and I want to prove it. But be warned, beauty is not tame.

(The author I referenced is Mark Manson, in his May 8 installment of "Thought Catalog." It is worth the read. It's tough love that Americans really should hear.)