Wasn't it part of the legend of Thomas Edison that he slept only a couple hours each night? He bragged that he never slept more than four hours a night, or something like that. I stopped being impressed with intentional sleep deprivation when I became a mother, and I discovered that napping when the kids napped was the best thing I could have done for myself. I was thrilled when my primary care doctor reiterated several times over that she wants me to sleep six or seven hours at night, and two or three hours each afternoon for a nap. But here's the problem: I can't do it. For months, I've had increasingly worse trouble sleeping, to the point that I did not sleep even for a minute at all last night. I tried. I turned out the lights and lay in the dark, wishing sleep would come. Then I gave up and read a little on my phone. Then I turned a light back on and read an actual paper book. Then light off again, but texting all night to people who were awake by necessity, not choice or at the behest of a rebellious body. At around six am, I tried to prop myself up on my elbows before rolling over in bed, and strained my shoulder picking up the extra thirty-five pounds of white-bellied felines pinning me down. I took a painkiller, and hoped that would knock me out. Not even close. Eventually I gave up and started cleaning house in anticipation of my dinner guest, and I've been awake ever since. My eyes feel like hot balls of lead. My focus is non-existent. But I can't even guess whether I will be able to sleep for real when I try in a little bit.
I promised that I'd come up with a new recipe today, for my friend who came over for dinner and to see my house for the first time. In my sleep-deprived state, my ability to invent a radically new dish was somewhat less impressive than the chronically sleepy scientists at Edison's laboratory. I mostly just tweaked the flavors of things I've made before. Tonight's grain free comfort food was braised chicken smothered with apple chutney (gee, inspired by my Cyclhops dinner on my birthday?) and mashed cauliflower with three cheeses. I used orange cauliflower, boiled and drained it, mashed it, and then added cream cheese, shredded Parmesan, and shredded cheddar. Easy-peasy. The chicken was browned in butter, braised in chicken stock for almost an hour (covered), and then the meat removed from the pan while I reduced the sauce. I put a little Amaretto in it for sweetness as I reduced and caramelized it. I added the chutney I'd prepared earlier, with onion and celery softened in butter, to which I added apples, raisins, a couple fresh sage leaves, a sprinkle of cinnamon and nutmeg, and the juice of one lemon, all cooked covered until soft. That's it. It tasted fantastic, and was ridiculously easy. Is it worth writing this out with measurements and directions in the cookbook I'm wanting to put together? It seemed so easy to me that I obviously could do it half asleep. But maybe people who are just learning how to make things without wheat flour could use a friendly nudge to find out how simple it is to make something that tastes way fancier than it is.
I almost fell asleep listening to the football game on the radio, but that isn't a surprise. It was one of those "defensive stand" sort of days. The game caller suggested it was as much fun as watching paint dry. By the fourth quarter, my team was clinging to a 7-3 lead they'd had since early in the second quarter, and I just couldn't remain enthused anymore. My face rested on my fist, and I leaned heavily on the arm of my chair, "just resting" my eyes. And then there was a late game interception that locked in our win, and I sat bolt upright again. I've been going ever since. Now that my house is quiet again, and the kitchen is cleaned after dinner, there's no reason for me not to go crash. It's likely that I'll fall asleep as I crawl onto the mattress. But what if I don't? Is it worth having something to guarantee a good night's sleep next to the bed, or will that jinx me into needing it because I can't sleep? Either way, it's time to find out. Staying up two whole days without a break is no fun. I don't ever want to do this again. Not even if it were to make me as successful an entrepreneur as Edison. It's lights out time for me.
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