So Little Time

Inspirational song: Morning Has Broken (Cat Stevens)

I'm in a race against time, in a grand sense and on a very small scale. I have 19% battery left on my laptop, and my charger is on the opposite side of the house. And I have more work to do on any given day than I am used to handling any time in the last, oh, let's say six years. Once upon a time, I had no problems working full time and then some. I was a compulsive overworker, always staying well past my scheduled hours to make sure every single thing got done, even if I wasn't allowed to earn even one cent of overtime. I'd go in cycles, wearing myself out, burning out and doing nothing, healing, starting off working part time, ramping up to full time, and back to wearing myself out working all the time. I've repeated that series at least four or five times since I attained adulthood.

I'm doing it again. I've got two challenging deals where I have to be particularly involved, especially in the one where the other agent seems to have trouble getting documents completed and back to me. I have been adding in lots of projects and tasks in my private life, as I am learning to care again about how the household runs. And then today, I had my first training day for the new job at Rotary. I took copious notes about how to update the website, put out the weekly newsletter, and do mass emails to the group. I was there until my brain was full. By the time I got home, all I wanted to do was nap, but I had to keep working for hours after that, and so I did.

I woke at six this morning. I didn't mean to, but once I did, I stayed awake. I tried for only about ten minutes to go back to sleep, before I reached down for my computer that was leaning against the bed. (That's where the charger still is, to refer back to paragraph one.) I've been wondering what happened to the first set of buyers, the ones I worked with for a full year. We had a good enough relationship, so maybe there is no shame in admitting I am still harboring a little soreness in my heart over the day they told me that they were going to list the house they needed to sell with a relative who had just gotten her license. I've often wondered whether it sold already, and if so, for how much. Keeping an eye on the market isn't snooping. It's part of my job. So I looked. It sold, and closed last week. I haven't let myself decide how I feel about it yet. I don't have the time.