Sunday, October 6, 2013

Reach Out and Touch Me

Inspirational song: Communiqué (Dire Straits)

Among the powers television has (such as the powers to educate or to corrupt), is its ability to be the focus around which humans bond. Pop culture is built around these kinds of common experiences. Some relationships rely on this very thing. I have known lots of couples whose "thing" is watching a television series together, and bad things happen when one person skips ahead to see an episode without waiting for their partner. I have been ignored for half an hour when we arrived to visit out-of-town friends before Dr Who was over. I have been surprised when a male friend raced home so he could watch Army Wives while talking on the phone with his wife who was out of town. For the longest time, my man and I didn't have anything like that. He grew up singularly disinterested in television, whereas I am the child of parents who had televisions in every single room of the house. We have come close to finding a few shows that we are both interested in, in the last few years more than ever before, but I'm not sure we have an "our thing" yet. Today was a step in that direction, in the nerdiest way possible. Last night, one of our favorite comedians had a special on cable, and I recorded it. Rather than waiting until the man gets his vacation, months from now, I suggested we watch it together I'm the only way I knew how, via videoconferencing. I pulled a chair up close to the tv, turned it up loud, and pointed the iPad at the tv. It was not ideal, and I'm sure technical glitches diminished the experience for him a few times. But it was the closest we've had to getting to sit and watch tv together in months. I needed that common bond, and it felt good.

My man wasn't the only one reach out and touch me with a video link today. My mother and stepfather surprised me too. It was nice to "see" them, to talk nonsense to their dogs (and they to mine), and to feel a little less like I'm hanging out on the outer rim of the galaxy while I'm flying solo. I got to talk about my flooring choices in the condo, and get a little reaffirmation that I'm doing the right thing for the places in the long term. I needed that. 

I also got to speak to my younger daughter this evening, about the progress made (or not) in their living situations. I was under the impression that they had already left her godmother's house, since their deadline was a day or two ago. I tried to impress upon her that if the other kitchen is not pulled out, and if they tell us Tuesday that they aren't going to do so at all, then I want everyone staying at that unit for the duration of the restoration. It is far better than trying to find an expensive rental and paying an enormous pet deposit when we should have all the cats and dog at the condo. I'm sure I will get grief over pushing for it, as I have for everything all through this process, but until I am told that unit is legally uninhabitable, I am considering it fair game. I'm willing to fight for that position.



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