On Tuesday, focusing on the guest speaker was almost impossible. He was presenting a program that was probably very interesting, and if I had been in a better mood, I might have appreciated it more. All I remember is that he was from the school district, and he was talking about some cool program they were working on, that was improving the opportunities for local students. When he led with an explanation of how to use their new web site to track stuff, I zoned out immediately. All of a sudden, the idea of creating logins and tracking progress of anything just exhausted me. At first, I didn't even understand what it was the database was designed to compile. It wasn't until the questions from fellow Rotarians started that I pieced together some of what I missed, even though I'd been staring at him the whole time. It seemed to be about volunteers mentoring students, mostly in STEM programs, or that's what I think it might have been. I was too tired to ask anyone around me if that's what it was.
I think I've been fighting too hard putting out too many fires. The worst thing I could imagine right now would be to learn yet another platform, and being forced to login often and track anything. Anything. My boss asked us to put together information on a real estate site, and that appears to have been the last thing my brain could take in. To be honest, it crossed the line into too much about halfway through the process. I need to bleed off a little of the pressure, so I can go back and finish my own profile. I never uploaded a bio or added my sales information to it. This isn't the first platform to flirt with being too much for me. I created an Instagram account, uploaded three or four pictures to it, and then barely went back for more than a year. Every so often it sends me notices that someone started following me, and I wonder: Why? Really, why? I haven't done anything of value there in ages. What's to follow? It feels like more than I want to handle.
Is this level of burnout because of having to juggle so many doctor appointments and bills and symptoms? Or is it because I'm getting older and less interested in learning new technologies? Maybe I feel older because of the tech itself. I don't know how to chicken and egg this stuff. It's too much effort while I'm burned out. Maybe a vacation from tech would help me, if I could walk away from Twitter and iPad time wasters for more than an hour.
No comments:
Post a Comment