Starting to get really tired of looking for funny stories in a fibromyalgia flare. There weren’t any today. There was just a lot of pain, muscle spasms, and feeling sorry for myself. The boys were up at the cabin all day, getting great work done putting steel siding on the last bit of exterior wall and swapping the door to a more typical setup (with the screen on the outside where the glass window is exposed to risk of flying debris on a windy day). I stayed home, slept in because I hadn’t fallen asleep until after 2 am last night, and I was clenched up in a miserable ball most of the day. I’m not looking for sympathy. In fact, I’m so cranky, I do not believe I could appreciate it if it were offered. I mostly want to be by myself while I wait for this to end. Standard medications and methods are failing me. I slept with a lidocaine patch on my back, and woke up still in misery, so that was a waste. I took my regular anti inflammatory meds, hydroxychloroquine, and vitamin D this morning, with a baclofen chaser, and that did nothing. I soaked in the hot tub briefly, but it was late enough in the afternoon that the sun shone on me, making me question why I bothered going outside at all. As soon as I crawled out of the water, my muscles hardened back up, and feeding the cats and dogs became nearly impossible. I made the dogs wait until I’d taken a tramadol, so that I could make it up and down the three stairs between their bowls, their food, and my kitchen multiple times. And honestly, that was all the relief the pill gave me, and no more. I’m lucky that my nightly blog is not on video, because my jaw and all the muscles that feed into it are clenched so tight that I can’t speak.
Yesterday the Mr looked at the faded green leaves thickly carpeting the neighbor’s lawn and driveway, and said that it looked like T’s big tree had crapped itself (paraphrasing). The early freeze did a number on everything here. We failed to harvest the little, underripe nectarines off the backyard tree, and now they are rotting on the branches among the wilted leaves. For all the tomatillos brought in early last week, there are just as many still rotting over the cages outside. I absolutely love that it got so cold so suddenly, but I think my body is reacting the same way as my garden. It’s not pretty.
Everything hurts and I’m grumpy. I am going to go fall asleep with SNL on TV, and hope that my brain absorbs a joke or two and improves my mood.
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