One of my good friends came up to visit me today. We haven't hung out together in months, and we were way overdue for a girls day out. We had a specific mission to get to, but more about that in a second. Our first order of business was to take me around on errands, and I kept failing at every turn to get what I needed. She managed to pick up more stuff than I did in each location, save one. Our first stop was a complete failure, as the hot tub store was closed when we arrived, even though the posted hours said it should have been open. Maybe it was closed for Indigenous Peoples Day, but you'd think that holiday weekends were good sale days at a store like that. Whatever, dudes. Live on your own time. I moved on. I also failed to get crickets at the pet store, and I got the wrong size of button batteries at Target. My poor friend said she was going to spend no money, and she filled up the back seat of the car with the stuff she found while I wandered around the stores. It was all going great until she got called away while we waited for our lunch to arrive at the table, and we had to wrap it all up and drop me at home.
Her primary task today was to be my guide and mentor for something about which I have remained mostly ignorant, despite living in Colorado for more than three years now. I've talked about the muscle spasms I've been having for a while, the reason my neurologist sent me in for an EEG last week. Despite showing up sleep deprived as instructed, I don't think the monitors captured lightning in a bottle. I only had the smallest head twitches while there, and my pessimistic side expects the test results to show absolutely nothing of value. I anticipate being told "you're fine, let's just watch this for a while." I won't take that for an answer, but I really believe it will take a fight to prove that I need further study. It's usually evening when my head whips around repeatedly like a chiropractor has his hands on me, five to ten times a minute, for several minutes at a stretch. I have discovered that there is a telltale nausea that heralds the onset of a group of these spasms. They also sort of leave me with a headache (little wonder). I'm currently attempting to learn whether I can self-medicate myself into fewer of these episodes, while I wait for my follow-up appointment, and possible protracted battle for treatment or at least further tests.
I don't like the sensation of being high. I really don't. It is probably related to nerve damage from going undiagnosed with lupus and fibromyalgia for decades. I don't like the strong painkillers they give you after surgery. I don't like being super drunk. And I don't like being high on THC. I don't tell other people what to do with their own bodies, but I know it isn't right for me. However, I have long believed that the laws prohibiting access to cannabis and its derivatives are stupidly draconian, racist, and outdated. I am thrilled that states have taken it upon themselves to legalize and regulate in ways that they see fit. I believe that a tipping point is being reached, when the national laws will catch up to states like Colorado, California, and Washington. Some places in the country may never fully accept those specific types of laws, but getting cannabis off the Schedule One drug list is necessary and will happen in the not too distant future, I believe.
My friend was along for emotional support and to bounce ideas off of when we went shopping at a local dispensary. (Side note: it recently took over the building that was my all-time favorite restaurant in the 80s and 90s, and I was so sad to be in that building without a plateful of Czech food in front of me.) I don't know what exactly will help calm this neurological problem, but between my friend and the helpful budtender, I came out with two edibles that are higher concentrates of CBD (very little THC) to try. I'm blogging early this evening, so that I can try one of them, and see whether I can fall asleep without the extreme startle response that has been keeping me awake for months (at night time and anytime I attempted a nap). I tried an edible Friday night, and rather than a long night of my head whipping around uncontrollably, it only happened a total of three or four times. The worst thing that happened to me was I polished off almost an entire container of green chile hummus and a bag of baby carrots, like my life depended on it. I think I can do this to get through the next two weeks, until I see the neurologist again. If it helps, it helps. If it doesn't, then I don't have to go back and spend a bunch of cash at the Old Prague (that isn't there anymore). Just because I signed up for the rewards card doesn't mean I have to use it.
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