For a day that seemed like all goals were too lofty, too insurmountable, I appear to have crested a few of them. I’m still not dancing around like I feel good or anything, but I hit two key milestones today. I’m proud of that.
I started my day hopeful. I got up and sat in my chair. I allowed the thought of coffee to flit through my mind, but I quickly dismissed it. I tried to sit there for about ten or fifteen minutes, until all the bad feelings came rushing back, and I gave up and crawled back in bed. I spent the entire rest of the day there (here).
My biggest pie in the sky goal was to wash my bedding and my body. These things desperately need to be done. I couldn’t stand up long enough to strip the bed, and by mid-afternoon I had accepted defeat on that. I kept telling myself that a bath would be super helpful. It wasn’t until almost 7:30 that I finally found the fortitude to rinse off quickly, for the first time since Thursday morning. I’m probably only slightly less stinky, for how brief my shower was, but it’s still slightly more sanitary, for which I am grateful. I crawled back into dirty sheets, but I’m not complaining.
My mouth tastes awful. No matter how much I sip water, or how often I brush my teeth, it stays awful. It makes eating impossible. It took me five or six hours of building myself up to try to eat a single spoonful of vanilla ice cream, and now I’m in the process of keeping it down. I won’t declare victory unless it stays down to tomorrow,
I know eventually I will eat. At some point, food will even start to taste good again. It would be nice if I were interested in food in time to make green chile with the bountiful harvest of tomatillos that is on its way. The Mr sent me a picture of the first good one today. I can’t wait.
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