Friday, September 4, 2020

On the Couch

Inspirational song: Marbles III (Marillion)

My friend Molly died six years ago this month. I think about her every so often, but I really missed her today. The last time we really talked, we were making plans to meet up again in Montreal, at the Marillion convention that was planned for two years out. We had attended three shows together by that point (counting the first Fish solo show where we met in 1997), and had gotten together for garden parties a few times over. I will never forget the joy on her face at that first concert after her transition, when our eyes met during the opening lines of the opening song Invisible Man. She sang along, "I haven't changed--I swear I haven't changed." It was true. She had just become herself, and I could feel her contentment.

When she died her girlfriend, who was never as into Marillion as Molly and I, packed up her decades of concert t-shirts and mailed them to me. Most of them have stayed in the box in my closet, as living in this house for five whole years doesn't mean I ever totally unpacked. Today, I reached into the box blindly, saying I would wear whatever shirt I grabbed first. It was the Marbles tour shirt, and I said fine, I was at that show in Boulder. I'm wearing it now.

Because of the pandemic, this year's Marillion convention is digital. They called it the "Couch Convention." They are streaming on YouTube this weekend, making all content free for all. Some of the band members filmed little segments, then they played songs by several opening acts. They let all of the regular crew say a few words, with a scroll giving a PayPal tip jar account to help support them (this has been really rough on tour crews, with no live shows all year). Then they played a recent concert video, "Marbles in the Park." It was that album straight through. I had no idea that was the schedule for opening day. It was just a happy coincidence that I chose to dress as if I were there.

When the show started, with Invisible Man, I touched the image on my shirt, and gave Molly a shout-out in my heart. Miss you, friend.

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