Too many times in the last week, I have run myself down to zero battery. I don't even know whether normal people experience this level of exhaustion on a regular basis to understand what I mean. I'm talking glassy-eyed stare, can't make a fist, not only does talking feel like too much energy, but even holding my teeth together is hard at times like that. Words come out funny, when they come out at all. And the idea of raising my arms to put water or food in my face to add back ATP just sounds like too much work. Is this something everybody feels from an average day of driving around to one or two stores, and then sitting in a group of people, sharing stories over dinner? It feels like I'm hitting that stage far too quickly, far too often. The only thing I can guess to attribute it to is that this round of cancer is hitting me harder. I don't know why that would be so. I'm no oncologist.
I just let the tiredness embrace me today. I didn't try to do anything remotely taxing. For the most part, I stayed in my chair and dozed frequently throughout the day. If I'm lucky, I will have recharged enough by tomorrow to do my usual Tuesday activities.
I suppose I can use one of the photos I held back from yesterday. Tiny Carmen was giving the Mr the stink-eye. I turned to take her picture, and she moved, and looked far more innocent than she had seconds earlier. Ignore the messy table next to her. That's where Valerie had been snacking.
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