Do Not Bend

Inspirational song: Hips Don't Lie (Shakira ft. Wyclef Jean)

I have my crankypants on tonight. I've tried not to focus on it when I write lately, but for three or four days now, I've been nearly immobile. I strained my hips somehow, and nothing is helping. 

I have notoriously unstable joints, have since childhood, and sometimes one of them will take off on their own and cause problems. This isn't even the first time this exact thing has happened. When I was pregnant with daughter #1, I spent a few days visibly curved in a sideways S shape, with one hip pushed way out to one side. It resolved itself eventually, and I assumed I'd just slept wrong. When I was pregnant again a couple years later, it happened again, and I started wondering whether that might be the trigger. Turns out it wasn't, and every few years it happened again, even long after I got out of the baby-making business. The last time it was this bad, it went on a super long time, and I ended up with a lupus diagnosis. If I were to guess, I'd say that was really the underlying problem all along.

Any time I start feeling like my efforts around this house are underappreciated, when I start imagining I'm seeing judgement and disapproval for how much I contribute to the household, I should refer back to this week and relax a bit. I've been unable to bend down to the floor or stand at a counter since Friday. In a few short days, it looks like our house has been overrun by 30-50 feral hogs. There are toys everywhere, tools everywhere, dishes everywhere, and there is a layer of dirt on the floor so thick it looks like Saoirse was used as a pack horse to carry it in. I know Mr S-P has been super busy with his own list of things to repair (here, next door, and over at the kids' house), but I always say if you won't help, don't hinder. It looks like he just tipped over containers and walked away from them. It will take me an extra long time just to get back to the level where I usually look around and think, man, this place is a wreck. I hope this inflammation in my hips dies down quickly. I can't live like this.