Dazzling

Inspirational song: Just a Gigolo (David Lee Roth)

Episode 3770 (give or take): the one in which Dmitri previews our future, and we are doomed.

We repeated the protocol for last Sunday. We went to babysit at the kids' house instead of our own, so grandpa could finish the setup of the play structure he acquired from Resource. He worked on it for an hour before deciding he had the wrong bolts, and we took a quick trip to Lowe's. (No plants were purchased in the making of this episode.) Dmitri fell asleep almost the second we got in the car, so we took him inside in his carrier, little bare feet poking up from under the canopy of the folding shade. As we stood at the registers, his little eyes opened, and he was saddened to realize he had to stay strapped in until we got home.

He cheered up while he and I played inside, so he wasn't in danger while power tools were in use and the swimming pool was unguarded. He was very snuggly, leaning against me to watch Bluey while he sucked down a bucketful of juice. He found a pair of sunglasses that Auntie had sent for his birthday, and wanted them placed on his face. He posed for several pictures with them, and hoo-boy, was that kid charming.

After a long day of playground-building, grandpa finished up enough for them to have an inaugural swing, and then we packed up and went out to dinner. We chose a regional Mexican chain, full of bright colors and ornamentation that appealed to the boy. He was too wiggly to sit and wait for food, even with chips to nibble on, so the two gentlemen went wandering around the restaurant while Val and I sat and colored. Eventually they returned, several minutes after the food was delivered. He made a good showing of eating rice and quesadilla, even if chunks of it ended up in his booster seat. At one point, the Mr was trying to hold him back from climbing on the table, and that kid jumped, hands outstretched, trying to leap over the restraining arm. Mr S-P and I locked eyes, stunned, and after a few seconds I said, "We in danger, girl."

Seconds after the lunge, Dmitri tripped backwards over his booster seat and landed in the corner of the booth, bonking the back of his head on the wall. He cried, and while grandpa was holding and soothing him, the hostess came over. She asked if she could hold him, and he went willingly to be cuddled by the pretty young woman. She bounced and talked to him, and soon they were joined by two more women on the staff. That kid. I swear we are not ready for the force of nature that is our grandson.