Monday, May 1, 2023

Mayday

Inspirational song: Cup of Wonder (Jethro Tull)

I needed a timeout today. I was in such sensory overload between kids and cats and general life in and immediately outside of this house that I started to panic. I caught myself being a little short with both kids, and I knew the best thing for all of us was a nap. It was Dmitri's regular naptime, or thereabouts, and I set us up all in a row on my bed. I turned on the YouTube video of a crackling fire that we usually watch for naps, got a couple super plush blankets, and we just cuddled until all three of us were asleep. I don't know how long we were out, but it was probably more than an hour. It's a very good thing I did that. I went from wanting to run away screaming to able to maintain my cool for the rest of the day. They seemed to like having a calm, composed grandma.

I didn't get anything done off my urgent list. I'm still a bit panicked about that. I'm freaking out about time, which is causing me to freak out about a lot of stuff. I don't know what to do about it other than call it a night and start again tomorrow. There will be no kids, so maybe I can function as an adult as I need to. I just need to shut out the rest of the distractions too.

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