Friday, October 1, 2021

Take Five

Inspirational song: Relax (Frankie Goes to Hollywood)

As a pure guess, I figure the area being irradiated is a polygon that is roughly eight inches wide, six inches tall. Give or take. Compare this to the last time, where I doubt it was all of four by one inches. Then it was twice a day, for five days, and done. This morning was day five, dose five. The radiation nurse said, as she helped me get up out of my treatment pose, hey at least you are almost one-third done! That wasn't quite the comfort she intended.

I woke with extra fatigue and nausea, and it never really got better. I went for my first massage since the surgery, and I actually dreaded it. How is that possible? I have a fantastic friendship with my regular therapist and trust him implicitly. I just didn't want to go back out for any reason, even a good one. The massage itself was lovely, and I even managed to spend the last half hour face down without setting off tender spots (I took in a super soft pillow of my own). If I could have postponed it at the last minute, I still would have.

I can't tell what exactly is making me feel so crummy. It could be the radiation. It could be the UTI. Or meds for same. Or weather, stress, or good old lupus. I'm working on accepting that I probably won't make it for my annual trek up to the cabin, unless the deep snow holds off until after Halloween.

No comments:

Post a Comment